Washington, DC -- (ReleaseWire) -- 07/12/2016 --DAWN BENNETT: Vanity Fair recently published an article about the "new prostitution economy" which was really fascinating. Today, I have Barndon Wade on the show. Wade is an American businessman who's founder and chief executive officer of InfoStream Group, an online dating company. He's also a graduate of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) and an MBA graduate of MIT's Sloan School of Management. InfoStream Group runs three online dating sites, one of which is called SeekingArrangement. The second is called WhatsYourPrice, and the third is MissTravel. I believe Wade will have something interesting to say about the economics of prostitution, which at the end of the day is a simple question to me of "What's a wife, what's a girlfriend, and what's a whore." I don't mean to be indelicate, but that's where we'll begin. Brandon, welcome to Financial Myth Busting.
BRANDON WADE: Hi, Dawn. Thank you for having me.
BENNETT: Years ago supermodel Jerry Hall quipped when she was married to Mick Jagger that she was "a maid in the living room, and a whore in the bedroom". One normally can't be a wife and a whore. However, when you combine this with the fact that marriage can be an important source of income for women, and it follows that prostitution must pay better than other jobs to compensate for the opportunity cost lost from "marriage market earnings." What do you think about that?
WADE: Well that's the point, I think. In any relationship money and finance is involved. I'm actually quite upset at the article that Vanity Fair published calling dating today, or specifically dating sites such as the ones that I own, the new prostitution economy, because that's certainly not true. There is a clear line that separates prostitution from relationships. But I do agree that romantic relationships, be it a girlfriend boyfriend relationship, or specifically marriages, is really at the end of the day some sort of financial exchange. Often financial exchange is deeply or greatly involved. That's what I think. Yes.
BENNETT: The article focused on how young American women, almost all of whom are struggling with student loans, and other soaring cost of living, are increasingly turning to trading sex for cash and/or other payments, right?
WADE: Yes. It has been the case since I was in college. I mean back in those days the news organizations were actually talking about women stripping, or even donating their eggs for money to pay for college. It's not much different today, except that now it's a lot easier to date wealthy men. Back when I was at MIT I had beautiful friends living in my dorm who were dating older men. So it was already happening back then, just certainly not as readily available as it is today. You have websites such as mine to make it so much easier to find somebody who is wealthy, who is willing to help you with simply a few clicks.
BENNETT: I think the internet is making the buying and selling of sex a lot easier and safer. Therefore the government should just try to stop banning it. I think prostitution is moving online whether the government likes it or not, and if they try to get in the way of the shift I don't know if that's even realistic. What are your thoughts on that?
WADE: Well I live in Nevada. I mean the business is based here in Nevada. If you know in Nevada there's specifically a few counties, prostitution is legalized in their brothels. I do know that if you work in a brothel you need to be STD tested weekly, so it's actually safer for everyone involved. Personally, I feel that libertarian principles should be at work here: government should stay away from people's private lives. Instead, they should be protecting us, and making the entire process safer. So while I don't think any of my websites have anything in common with prostitution, I do strongly believe that prostitution should in fact be legalized, and therefore controlled.
BENNETT: Do you think that the tumbling economy has undercut even dating websites, and prostitution? Do you think that you're getting that effect?
WADE: When you say undercut, meaning you're driving more clients that way, or...?
BENNETT: No. I mean is this tumbling economy actually undercutting your business? I know you're not in the prostitution business, I'm talking actually about two separate questions. Undercutting prostitution, and also undercutting the online dating business.
WADE: I don't think so. It's kind of funny because there was some article published about how more people were actually joining dating websites when they were slightly depressed, because they don't want to be alone. So when the economy became worse, when the banks were shutting down in 2009, and real estate was falling drastically we saw a huge increase in membership. That was partly driven by people who obviously had financial issues, and needed to find a way out. College loans are one of the main drivers, but beyond that there are other issues driving people, such as the ability to pay rent. That's the other main thing that we see people searching, and finally joining SeekingArrangement to find sugar daddies to help them pay rent. A lot of the more basic necessities come first before we start seeing people who actually join our website looking for things like shopping, or plastic surgery, and things like that. So I guess we live in a world where you have to have your basic needs met. Rent, having a roof, and having food on the table, those are the most basic of needs.
BENNETT: In Greece it was actually reported last year that the people in high skilled professions like doctors and lawyers were increasingly turning to prostitution to make ends meet. So the stereotype of the services of these young, cash strapped women seeking well off older men, what you call sugar daddies. I think it's fascinating. Do you think that's happening all over the world? Do you think it's actually still happening here in the United States? Has it increased?
WADE: It has certainly increased. We have seen our membership grow to over 5.5 million currently worldwide. The US represents about 60 percent of our traffic, so it's huge. It's trending. I think if you search the term on, be it Instagram, on Twitter, the word sugar daddy, you'll constantly see people tweeting about how they want to get a sugar daddy. That's the funny thing, a sugar daddy back in my days was someone who was very old, and unattractive. They think of somebody in their 70s or 80s perhaps. But not today. I think if you look at the members on SeekingArrangement, the average sugar daddy is 40 years old. He is pretty damn good looking. He makes over $250,000 a year. So that's more in line with the advice that my mom used to give my sister. You need to find a rich guy, someone who is generous, somebody who is going to take care of you. So her very practical Italian mom type of advice is why marry a poor guy when you can marry a rich one. Why not find the best. If you're writing your resume to search for the best job possible for your career advancement then you should really be doing the same for your romantic life, because that is a huge aspect of your life.
BENNETT: Right. I mean, but there are older women that actually are participating in it now. You were saying typically it has been younger women with older men. But now there are older women that are actually doing it too.
WADE: This is the empowering aspect that I want to speak about too. Because when I look at my sister, when I launched SeekingArrangement strangely enough she joined. Back then she was living in the Bay Area, working for a high tech company. She graduated from Brown with both a bachelor's and a masters degree in computer science. And she was dating very wealthy, successful CEOs in the Bay Area who over time became her mentors, and became really good friends whom she still keeps in touch with even today. Now she's very successful, so she's back on the site, and now she's a sugar mommy dating younger guys. So it's a story of how empowering the site really can be as well for women.
BENNETT: Last year a website that facilitated infidelity, AshleyMadison.com, had its user base hacked, and released to the public causing a lot of humiliation and fallout. Are you worried at all about similar attacks on your site?
WADE: I think attacks will always happen. It happened to Clinton's server. It happens everywhere, so we have to always be diligent. But in fact before the Ashley Madison hack even happened, all of our emails for all of our clients were already encrypted. So that's at least one level of protection that we offer people. Which is even if somebody were to be able to hack our database, and steal all of the emails, they are actually gibberish. So unless they know how to reverse engineer the encryption they are not going to find the person's email. That said, the hack actually caused some issues for us. We started getting lots and lots of calls from people telling us that they want their information deleted off the site. It was kind of an interesting challenge at the end of the day.
BENNETT: Sites like yours, and apps like Tinder are effectively removing courtship from the process of developing romantic relationships. So I want to talk about the psychology and sociology of this. Do you actually think that that's a good thing in the long run? I mean it has been said that men achieve great things largely just to impress a woman back home. Does making sex so easy to achieve lessen the ambition to achieve great things do you think?
WADE: Well you see there's a big difference between SeekingArrangement and Tinder. I am not a fan of Tinder. I will say I completely agree with you, I think Tinder's approach of simply swiping left and right, and then meeting and having hookups is certainly not very conducive to developing deep relationships. On the other hand I think SeekingArrangement is designed to be the modern way in which relationships ought to be conducted. Because what we're talking about is two people who are very clear up front about exactly what they want, what they want to receive from each other, what they want to give to each other. It's sort of like discussing a prenuptial agreement before your marriage.
You're really talking about two people discussing exactly what they want from each other, what they expect from each other right up front. Imagine if you do that, instead of the traditional dating where you're actually beating around the bush, and you're hiding exactly what you want, or what you want the other person to know about you until they discover it over the course of the relationship. So the SeekingArrangement method is a more direct, up front, brutally honest, let's get everything on the table approach, and that really actually helps.
BENNETT: Do you think this kind of site like yours makes men more desirable?
WADE: Absolutely. The reason I launched SeekingArrangement was because I was on Match.com back in those days about ten years ago. I had my credentials that I have today. I had an MBA from MIT, I was making six figures. I would write hundreds of emails, I would get just one or two maybe responses, at most, a day. Then to turn those into real dates was quite a challenge. I remember the advice that my mother gave me when I was younger. She said just study hard, focus on your school, someday you'll be successful, and all the women will flock to you. So SeekingArrangement was designed with that advice in mind.
Surprisingly, the moment I launched it, within two weeks we had 5,000 members. The ratio of men to women was one guy to ten women. I was its first member, and it was just amazing. I never had to write hundreds of email again. I was getting responses, I was getting people writing to me immediately. So the concept of whether the site makes men more attractive, absolutely. Because the size of your wallet, the size of, how much generosity you're willing to give is a big factor when it comes to attracting women. Much like your amazing biceps or triceps, and going to the gym.
BENNETT: Let's talk about deep relationships. You did talk about how the sites can actually deepen a relationship. You once did an essay for CNN saying that love is a concept invented by poor people. Why do you think that? Does that mean you're not married to who you think is your soul mate? Do soul mates even exist?
WADE: I believe soul mates exist. I think a few of us are probably very lucky to be able to find our soul mates. I do believe that infatuation, which is the sort of love that people talk about, love at first sight, when you first see someone you go crazy, there's this electricity down your spine? That's the sort of love that I think does not exist. Love is hard work. I am married, and I know it takes effort, it takes compromise. It's not that crazy, electrifying feeling that people feel for each other in the beginning. Sometimes I see people who still have their magic spark. But most of the time when I talk to couples who have been together for 30, 40, 50 years I hear that it is hard work, and it's a lot of working together over issues, and truly deeply caring for each other in a selfless way.
BENNETT: Brandon, I want to thank you so much for being on the show.
For over a quarter century, Dawn Bennett has been successfully guiding clients through the complexities of wealth management. Her unique vision and insight into market trends makes Bennett a much sought after expert resource with regular appearances on Fox News Channel, CNBC, Bloomberg TV, and MSNBC as well as being featured in Business Week, Fortune, The NY Times, The NY Sun, Washington Business Journal in addition to her highly regarded weekly talk radio program - Financial Mythbusting. Through prudent and thoughtful advice, Dawn Bennett has strived to consistently provide the highest quality of guidance.
About Dawn Bennett
For over a quarter century, Dawn Bennett has been successfully guiding clients through the complexities of wealth management. Her unique vision and insight into market trends makes Bennett a much sought after expert resource with regular appearances on Fox News Channel, CNBC, Bloomberg TV, and MSNBC as well as being featured in Business Week, Fortune, The NY Times, The NY Sun, Washington Business Journal in addition to her highly regarded weekly talk radio program - Financial Mythbusting. Through prudent and thoughtful advice, Dawn Bennett has strived to consistently provide the highest quality of guidance.